Healer, Heal Thyself

Mony Dojeiji reflection on healing

If there is nothing out there, then who is out there to heal?

I have pondered this question often, and have hesitated sharing my reflections because I have friends and family who are healers in all fields – medical, psychological, spiritual – and it is terrain that I respect and honour.

When I began my journey of awakening, I read everything related to healing. I was studying to go to medical school, even though it wasn’t really my passion or calling. But I had an interest in the human body, which led me to exploring what healing and wholeness means beyond the domain of the physical body.

As I understood that we are essentially energy, I began working with energy, directing it through me into my hands to whoever requested it. I was always clear, however, that I was merely the conduit and that the Energy (which I understood to be Love) knew exactly what it needed to do. My only role was to allow it to flow, as openly and purely as possible, unobstructed by my expectations and ideas about healing.

But as my own spiritual practice deepened, and as I began to understand that what I was seeing in my world was a PROJECTION of my inner world onto the screen of my life, I began to ask that difficult question:

If I’m the source of what’s in my experience, then what is this person with illness (cancer, diabetes, disorders, trauma, etc.) doing in my life?

Where is this projection coming from? And why?

To look within ME as the SOURCE of the “sick people” in my life shook me to the core and was a radical shift in my thinking because it was suggesting that:

The person in my life with cancer? I put them there.

The person with severe anxiety and trauma? I put them there.

The person who only spoke of illness and disease? I put them there.

It felt ridiculous to even consider that I would be putting these people in my life, in my experience. Why would I do that? What possible motive could I have?

To acknowledge, let alone accept and take 100% responsibility for this, has been a journey all its own!

Every so slowly, however, I began to unravel their purpose – their loving purpose – and the incredible gift these individuals were offering me, simply by showing up in my life.

They are the agents through which I am able to see and free the pain inside me.

And in liberating myself, I liberate them.

The deeply-rooted traumas, beliefs, programs, memories that I have around health and wholeness and WHO I AM are buried in my subconscious – way beyond the reach of my everyday mind.

When I feel afraid, impatient, dismissive, judgmental, distant, withholding, filled with tragedy – the range of emotions that show up when I’m with those individuals – that’s my clue that these subconscious programs are knocking on the door of my heart and asking to be freed. To be whole. To be returned to Love.

These individuals have taken on the loving task of showing me all the blockages to wholeness that exist within me, so that I may love them (the blockages) free.

And there is nothing in this Universe that I can Love free that isn’t freed everywhere.

Because we are all connected. We are all One.

Is there anything more loving that I can do to honour the precious gift of their presence - their True Self - than to do the inner work of healing the trauma at its source, which is within me?

That, to me, is how Love – and healing – works.

It’s a big task, for it requires me to be constantly in the present moment, aware of – and completely accepting of – whoever shows up in my experience.

If I see news about someone with cancer or any other illness, I am already clearing within me.

If I meet someone who tells me of their difficulties (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual), I’m clearing.

When someone comes to see me for a personal session, I’m clearing before I even see them.

I’m clearing within ME (in my subconscious mind) whatever has brought them into my experience, whatever binds us in less-than-wholeness. I do this work in the silence of my heart, and in connection with Spirit.

When I am with this person – if I need to be with them at all – I am fully present. I know my spaces are filled with Love. And that the energies that need to come through me at the moment – be they in words or in stillness – are Perfect.

That's the only healing work I do today. There is nothing out there.

Can you imagine what would happen if we all did this within ourselves for the “sick” people in our lives? If all healers did this inner work before even seeing a patient? Would the patients even still be sick?

So many questions to ponder… and revelations to be made on this journey.

Love, always. 🙏💞
Mony

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#monydojeiji #walkingforpeace #consciousness #healing #healer #nothingoutthere #love

I don't need to be right...

I don't need to be right.

I need to be Light.

#Inspiration for your day!

Bright blessings,
Mony


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#monydojeiji #consciousness #light #lightworkers #walkingforpeace #inspired #creative #love #vibration #transformation

Mony Moment: Life Lesson Learned from Helping Others

I was raised with the teaching that you always help those in need, especially your family and close friends. That, of course, included giving them money if they needed it.

I have recently had to revisit the wisdom of that teaching.

Many years ago, I loaned a sum of money to individuals who were like family to me. I didn’t formalize the loan with any legal documents, and trusted in their word and integrity to pay it back.

It came as a slap in the face to be told that, not only could they not pay back the loan, but that they considered what I had given them to be a gift.

I’ve spent the last few months doing a lot of inner work (especially self-forgiveness and Ho’oponopono) to deal with the anger, the betrayal and the humiliation. I’ve felt stupid, naïve and, above all else, terribly wounded.

Of course, I’ve taken legal action; but those of you who follow my writings know that I try to look upon these situations from the lens of Spirit, and to use them as opportunities for growth on all levels.

It would be easy to stay in the role of victim, and not examine my contributions, no matter how unconscious, to this drama. When I can finally come to the place of stillness and non-judgment, I begin to see that, perhaps, I created this scenario so that, at the highest levels, I expand my understanding of what it means to help another.

I believed I was doing the right thing by helping. I believed I was being understanding and compassionate.

But was I being wise?

I understand now that I wasn’t.

In my rush to fix my friends’ money problems and not see them suffer, I neglected to ask myself whether giving money would truly solve the deeper questions of their lives that they needed to address.

In my rush to be a saviour, helper and good friend, I neglected to see them as wise individuals capable of finding creative solutions to their self-made problems. I didn’t give them the chance to make difficult, values-based decisions, or to flex their problem-solving muscles.

Without meaning to, I disempowered them.

All parents understand this lesson well. It’s easy to step in and do everything for our children, but we know that in so doing, we take away their power to develop those all-important abilities to rationalize, to intuit, to reach beyond their known limits. There is power in the struggle, in the wrestling with ideas and feelings, in the arriving to a more confident place of understanding and wisdom.

But I didn’t have that wisdom then… :-)

Now, before offering to help or fix a situation, with money or time, I ask myself:

Why am I doing this? Are my actions in service to the highest within me? Within them? Or am I simply assuaging my guilt?

Do my actions empower them, or keep them as victims?

How am I seeing them? As incapable and in-need? Or fully capable and creative beings?

These are not easy questions to answer, for they force ME to wrestle and struggle with what I believe and with who I am as an individual.

But isn’t that what we’re all ultimately here for?

One of the techniques that has helped me move on from this situation, and gain a measure of peace, is a practice popularized by the Christian mystic Emmett Fox. It goes something like this:

“I now affirm and acknowledge the presence of Divine Truth, and only Truth, in them, in me and in this situation. It is the only consciousness at work. It arises in them and me, standing in full dominion, giving us each the courage to act with wisdom and love, rather than fear. And through Divine Power and Intelligence, I know that this situation is resolving itself for the highest good of all. I choose now to only allow those energies to manifest and be at play. A higher mind than mine is now working here, and I allow it to do its work.”

Or something like that, it depends on the moment!

The point is to only allow that consciousness, that energy, those words to permeate my thinking at all times.

I don’t always pull it off; but, when I do, I feel a tremendous power within me. I feel as if I’m not alone on this path, and that I am healing us and this situation on levels I can’t even begin to imagine.

Above all, I feel that I have honoured the spiritual path I am walking, to the best of my abilities today and now.

I hope this experience serves you in your life journeys.
Much love,
Mony

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Responding to Conflict

During moments of conflict, Alberto and I are sometimes asked why we keep silent, why we don’t add our voices in support of one side or another, why we don’t publish inflammatory remarks or images, why we don’t condemn what we see. How, we are asked, can we be silent when image after image shows evidence of the inhumanity and cruelty being perpetrated?

Of course, at times, I feel overwhelmed by anger and despair at what I see. I keep asking myself: when are people going to wake up?  When are they going to realize that war solves nothing, no matter the arguments from either side?

It is by choice that we retreat from the heavily-charged emotions and drama. It is by choice that we disengage from destructive and negative energies. There are enough people voicing their outrage, their condemnation, not only on the streets, but on social media and media of all kinds. There is no doubt that awareness of this situation exists. The big question is: now that we are aware, how do we proceed?

Experience has shown Alberto and I, over and again, that wherever we place our attention and our energies, especially passionate ones, will inevitably manifest in our reality in ways we can’t even imagine. Let me give you a simple example that happened to us just today that powerfully demonstrates what we mean. During lunch with a friend, we spoke at length about our recent experiences with people who invade our personal space asking for donations to the charity or cause they represent. It was a passionate conversation with each of us sharing our different stories. Not ten minutes into our conversation, a woman approached our table and, leaning into us, began to ask for money, in the same intense way that we were describing at that moment. The restaurant was full, and our table was in the center of the floor, but she, as if pulled by some invisible thread, came directly to us first. She eventually made her way around all the tables, but we couldn’t help but be amazed at this indisputable synchronicity.

This is but one small example of so many more we can share that demonstrate how intense, focused attention on any subject can make it appear in our reality.

We certainly don’t condemn those who choose to condemn. We applaud the efforts of those trying to create change in whichever way they feel works best for them, and which honors their beliefs and who they are. When we see angry protests, judgments of right and wrong, attempts to create divisions, calls for retribution… to us, these are energies which are adding to the anger, the judgment, the divisions that already exist. Despite their often noble intentions, by focusing so much negatively-charged attention, we feel that they may be amplifying the conflict more than healing it.

We prefer to seek out those who are choosing to create peace and reconciliation despite the horrors they are living. We place our energies and attention on the builders and peace-makers. Although the media may not report on them, they exist. Among them are: Palestine-loves-Israel, Israel-loves-Palestine, Iran-loves-Israel & Palestine, Parents Circle - Families Forum, YaLa-Young Leaders, Jews and Arabs Refuse to be Enemies, Jerusalem Hug, The Peace Factory, Peace It Together, Leading Leaders for Peace, and so many more.

We look within, always, to heal the divisions within our own hearts, from the personal to the emotional and spiritual, believing that inner peace and unity will manifest in outer peace and unity. As Gandhi said, we must be the peace we wish to see in the world.

We hold the image of a united people in our minds, feeding it with our thoughts and belief that it is not only possible, but happening, using the examples of the above-mentioned groups as a foundation.

Above all else, we remember that we chose our life and circumstances for a purpose, just as surely as every single human being on this earth has similarly chosen, for reasons our earthly minds cannot fathom, but which a greater Wisdom and Love does indeed comprehend.

And as difficult as it is to do, we hold on to the belief that, no matter how heart-wrenching the imagery or stories told, the life of each and every one of these individuals served a grand purpose in their spiritual journey and the journeys of all those whose lives they touched.

The days, or moments, when we feel strong and connected with Source, we extend the Light and Love to envelop all of creation, sensing this energy penetrate to the Divine core of every being, just as we feel it penetrating ours. In this way, we lift ourselves and the world around us.

In the silence, we create #peace.

#makepeace #iampeace #JewsandArabsRefuseToBeEnemies.

Our presence is often enough...

She walked into the bookstore just as I had finished setting up for the book signing. From the conversation that was easily overheard by everyone in this tiny community bookstore, it was clear that she was a student from China who was temporarily studying in Ottawa. What stood out about her, however, was the tension that she exuded; from her high-pitched, slightly-nervous voice, to her awkward gestures, rapid-fire questions and uncertain glances, this lovely, young woman was harbouring some deep pain.

I'm not even sure how I got pulled into the conversation she was having with the salesclerk, but before long, she was revealing her frustrations to me, her unhappiness with her studies, her anger at her father for not allowing her to choose the life she wanted to live, and so much more.... I barely had time to respond, and even when I could offer a comment, she continued to speak, in what was clearly a torrent of words and emotions that had too long been contained.   



A Cosmic Embrace (Source: www.eso.org)

So, I stood in the middle of the store, and listened, as she unburdened her soul. I breathed deeply, anchoring myself in my heart, allowing that energy to fill the space between us. And as the flow of words eased and her manner relaxed, her tears began to flow. I reached over and embraced her, saying very little, only reassuring her that she would find her way, but keeping the energy flowing. When she finally let go, she seemed in a daze, but infinitely more at ease. She asked me to recommend some self-help books, which I did, encouraging her to follow her instincts in choosing the ones that most spoke to her.

I didn't sell a single book that day, but in speaking with the salesclerk after, we both couldn't help but reflect that the true purpose of my being there that day had nothing to do with signing books; that at times we are brought to places to fulfill a role that goes beyond our preconceived plans, and to be, for that moment in time, the instrument though which the Universe brings forth the healing and love that will serve another in their journey.

All we need to do is show up, and open our hearts.

The Universe will take care of the rest.

Our presence is enough.

~Mony


 

When Terror Strikes

Source: Les ateliers Anisa

These last few days, I have kept the television off. I was aware of what was happening in Boston, but didn't want to get dragged into the high emotion and drama of it all. It's not easy to do; but events such as this really make me reflect. Those of you who have followed my blog and writings know that I believe my outer world reveals shades of what is happening in my inner world; that my inner world is continually speaking to me through outer experiences and events. And so, when I could finally quiet my thoughts and emotions, I journeyed to that inner place and, in the stillness, sought clarity and meaning.

What immediately strikes me is the symbolism of it all: it takes place at a Finish line when, after all the effort and work and struggle, runners arrive to claim their personal prize, joyous in the knowing that they made it and that, through sheer will and effort, they have come across this line… only to have it all taken away from them. It also takes place on Patriot Day, a day commemorating the first battles that began the American Revolution.

My question to myself is then: what is going on within me that has manifested as this event? And no, it’s not that I should give up because all effort will end tragically!

I do believe that there is a revolution going on; but it is in the heart of each and every one of us. It is the struggle between what the heart desires and wishes to express openly and freely… and what fear tells us we must not dare do. We strive, we risk, we pursue our highest calling, we engage the forces of creation and the heavens to help us in our quest… we feel alive and alight in the work we do to raise ourselves and those around us. And then something happens – something completely unexpected – to make us doubt our choices, to bring us back into the folds of fear, of smallness.

It is this inner struggle of so many people which is playing out in the world today. Trust, love, understand the “other”, reach for a higher understanding… OR be in fear, anger, judgment, separation, condemnation. Those forces are continually at play within each and every one of us, with every thought and every choice that we make.

And these forces, when enough people are feeling them, eventually manifest in our physical world; but they do so that they may show you their face, so that we may see in physical reality what this struggle looks like in our invisible inner world.

Some may call that force evil, but I don’t believe it is evil which is testing us. It is Love which is challenging us to choose Love anyways… to choose from that higher place within ourselves, despite the temptation towards hatred and anger and retaliation.

Who has not struggled to lift themselves from where they are? Who has not, through their own efforts and persistence achieved a goal and gotten to the finish line? Who has not seen their dreams and accomplishments thwarted, diminished, ignored… when they should have been celebrated? How many have dared to continue on with their dreams, believing in a higher purpose to their life, even when forces around them have tried to pull them back?

Again, I don’t believe these energies are evil. It is not evil that is testing you to see if you stand firm in your dream, in your calling, in your light. It is LOVE which is testing you, LOVE which is inviting you to CHOOSE IT ANYWAYS, despite the anger, the cynicism, the fury, the desire to fall back into fear and remain small… Love is asking you to stay in that place that lifts you, and in staying there (despite evidence that pulls at you to give up and go back to anger, indignation, retaliation), you heal and uplift not only yourself but the world around you. 

Those who take on the role of perpetrating these acts, of dying in these acts, are great souls. They are part of your story, and your journey. They offer themselves, taking on your hatred, your venom so that you may CHOOSE LOVE ANWWAYS and, in so doing, unleash a great energy that heals them and yourself. In choosing Love over hatred (as many great Masters have done), all energies are healed and elevated to the light that they are.

Martin Luther King Jr. said:

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that.

Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”

May love now and forevermore guide our steps.

~Mony

 

Energies

At times finding the words to express what is happening on the inner planes is not only difficult but takes time.  I need to reflect on the experience, try to give it some meaning, integrate its lesson into my ever-expanding concept of myself.  Energies too need words, and words themselves carry energies, and it is to this process that I have been especially dedicated in these last weeks.

So what energies in me are trying to be expressed at this moment? They mostly have to do with authenticity, truth, moving into a place of knowing, to a place of alignment with the highest aspect of myself; that place where my highest wisdom—wisdom garnered through experiences in lifetime after lifetime—resides, in the throne of the highest self. 

What is this highest self to which I refer?  It is the me that exists beyond body and form, beyond space and time as we know it; the part of me that is eternal and that knows its essence to be Divinity, to be an aspect of God in expression.  Some have called this the Higher Self, the inner Master, the Perfected Self, the Christ within, or the Christ Consciousness that dwells within man and of which man is made, but cloaked in physical form.

I’m trying to hear that Self, to know It, to communicate with it…that´s all!

This process has, of course, moved me into interesting territory.  I’m not one who sits and meditates often.  I prefer to go for a walk or perhaps practice yoga, which to me are also forms of connecting with that Higher aspect of myself.  But lately, I have found myself sitting in stillness, usually in the evening after Sylvana has gone to bed, and trying to make that connection.  I’m trying to clear my mind of preconceived notions of what that connection may feel like.  I do feel a tingling in my fingertips, a warmth that emanates from the heart centre and outwards. I feel relaxed but attentive. I know then that I’m connecting.  More and more, I receive thoughts and insights that I could never remember after my meditation, but that now I write down as they come to me.  Perhaps I’ll share some of these with you in later entries. 

In my most recent meditations, I have entered a state of stillness that I have never encountered before, a stillness of thoughts, of emotions, of being.  I felt detached, but not uncaring. On the contrary, there was a certainty and a knowing that all was well.  No thoughts entered. No feelings of fatigue or boredom, just a complete presence in the moment, a moment that lasted a long while. And in that moment, everything was perfect.

What I understood then was that this was the state of being I wanted to bring into the world—this connection in every moment with that Higher or Christ aspect of me, and this energy of assuredness and calm that it engendered. That is the energy that heals.  That is the energy that creates.  And that is the energy that wished to express itself in these days.

Connecting with that inner Master (mastery) and sharing that with the world (service) are what ultimately define my inner journey.  

The Garden

This past week I found myself spending more time than usual in our garden.  I actually know nothing about gardening, but the house we’re now living in has a large property which has been neglected for too many years.  The electric chainsaw, in the capable hands of my husband Alberto, has gotten quite the workout in cutting down branches and trimming trees. 

While there’s still a lot of work to be done, the thorn in my side has been the “garden” in front of the house – a crawling vine that has taken over the entire space, allowing only weeds and dandelions to peek through, and the dead trunk of some bush that was cut down but whose roots were never removed.  In the winter, under the cover of snow, it was easy to ignore.  But now in the full bloom of spring, and having to look at it every time I walked into and out of my home, I had to do something.

With the best intentions, my father came over one day and mowed down the vine. It looked better but I knew the roots were still there.  Same for the bush.  He hacked away at it and made it smaller but the job wasn’t done.  It was then that my personality came through.  I spent the day turning over the soil and pulling out the weeds from their roots.  The deeper the root system, the more satisfying was its removal.  

The bush was more challenging. I couldn’t go under it. I needed to dig around it and remove the soil to expose the root.  Brute force didn’t work.  So as I contemplated the bush during a break, I realized that I needed help.  I was tempted to call Alberto and the chain saw, but then decided to ask for the help of the invisible friends that I felt populated our garden. I guess you could call them nature spirits, fairies, elves. The name didn’t matter so much as the realization that they played a part in the growth and maintenance of all plant life, and so can help in their removal.

I stood in front of the bush, my back to the street so the neighbours wouldn’t think I was crazy.  I thanked the bush for providing shelter, nutrients and beauty to this space year after year without fail.  I actually felt appreciation for its many qualities.  I then asked its permission to remove it, with the help of the nature spirits, so that new life may grow there.  I’m not sure where the idea came from, most likely from the books on native teachings I’ve read.  When I returned to dig, I seemed to get under the root with more ease.  With a little more effort, I removed the bush.

I learned two things that day.  First, getting to the root of any negative experiences or emotions in my life is important to me.  There are teachings that favour not thinking about the negative, and focusing attention instead on the positive aspects or the desired outcome.  I wish I could do that.  My mind can’t overcome my emotions.  I need to understand why I feel the way I feel and make peace with it.  Once I’ve gotten to the root of the problem, then I can clean it up and plant new seeds that I wish to see grow.

Second, in this age of the Law of Attraction, where we are taught that we are 100% responsible for all that occurs in our lives, it reassures me to know that I’m not alone in my spiritual journey. I know I am surrounded by angels, guides who are there to nudge me in the direction of my highest choices. And what are those highest choices? The ones that bring me joy and peace, the ones that come from the heart.  I often forget that, and so in my times of confusion, I try to be still and will pull out an angel card from a deck that I own, or randomly grab any book and open it to a page.  What I most receive is clarity, and from there I am able to make a decision.     

Just before sending you this message, I pulled an angel card because I wasn’t sure about the gardening theme.  I pulled out the Archangel Gabriel who, among many things, is the Archangel of resurrection, the one who brings life to that which appears dead, just as nature does each spring. 

Much light to all,

Mony

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